Pathways: Summer 2000
July/August 2001
A Missionary Vocation Story.
-Sister Dianne Fanguy, CSJ
"Dee, what do you want to do that for?" my good friend Betty asked me when I said I was going to enter the Sisters of St. Joseph. I get even more questions now as I have gone outside of the United States to minister in Guatemala, Bolivia and Nicaragua. "There are a lot of poor people here," says my Mama, "why do you have to go so far away?"
The answer that arose unplanned from my soul when Betty questioned me was,"I need for my life to make a difference." That response remains as valid for me now as it did in 1957.
What has moved me? What continues to move me? Early on it was a challenge that stirred when I heard or read about Maryknoll, although I knew somehow that I was to be a Sister of St. Joseph. I needed the challenge of that deep, real humanity that's at the root of our contemplation and our mission as Sisters of St. Joseph. Early in my religious life I was haunted by some gospel passages: Jesus' proclamation as He began His own ministry in Luke 4:18 "The Spirit of the Lord is upon me (S)he has anointed me to bring glad tidings to the poor, to let the oppressed go free." And in Luke 7:22, when John sends his friends to Jesus and Jesus says to them, "Go and tell John what you have experienced: the poor have good news proclaimed to them". Some instinct in me told me that staying in the U.S. was not a radical enough answer to Love, for me, Dianne, though it is for most of my companions. "Why me, Lord?" I asked. Each of us knows to what we are called if we reflect in the presence of the Spirit.
The most radical overwhelming mystical grace of my life came to me after I had decided to uproot and go. The enormous peace that accompanies me to this day I would trade for nothing.
What do I do? I join my efforts with a national team in Nicaragua of Sisters and laity, men and women, Nicaraguans and non-Nicaraguans in a non-governmental organization called Cantera who, along with many others, are working against all odds for a social and spiritual transformation, within a deteriorating national context. I am a member of a team that accompanies a large, very poor community of resettled families outside of Managua, the capital. Nicaraguans are hard working idealistic people. In their poverty (80% of the population is poor, 50% live on less that $1.00 a day), about 100 volunteers of Ciudad Sandino, a resettlement community of about 150,000 people, carry on programs that serve children, youth and their families from 4 of its 11 zones, plus the post-Mitch refugee area called Nueva Vida.
It's been exciting to see the growth of 4 pre-schools; an enrichment program of art, crafts, music, dance, team sports, karate, story and poetry for children and adolescents; all the above for young women and men plus workshops facilitating spiritual, human, relational, social, juridical and organizational formation for youth. A significant goal is to train the people to assume responsibility for many of their own programs and to reproduce these workshops for other children, youth and adults. Who wouldn't feel fulfilled, joyful and grateful having the privilege of seeing that their own glad tidings and the talents and generosity of very poor people are rebounding throughout the Kingdom.
Come and See...
An opportunity for single Catholic women ages 20 - 45 to experience
the CSJ way of life.
August 30 - September 4, 2000
The Sisters of St. Joseph of Medaille invite you to join them
for this week, to learn what their life, mission and ministry
is all about. You will be joining with other women who are
thinking about religious life. There is no commitment made
by attending this week. And there is no charge for the week.
For more information call S. Ileana Fernandez, CSJ at 225- 344-0515 or email her ilyfercsj@aol.com
"The
Lord needs, and He has wished to need, your person,
your intelligence, your energy, your faith, your love, your
holiness.
He wants to speak to the people of today through your voice.
He wants to love with your heart.
He wants to help through you hands.
He wants to save through your efforts.
Think about it carefully.
The response that many of you give is given personally to
Christ, who is calling you for these great things."
John Paul II
My Vocation Story
By Sister Julie Kraemer,CSJ
As long as I can remember, I have wanted to be a religious Sister. I remember telling my teacher in third grade that I wanted to be a nun, a nurse, or a secretary. The feeling never went away of wanting to become a Sister, but I kept asking God, "If you want me to be a Sister, then give me a sign." The sign I was looking for never came.
I became involved in serving the church in every way possible: reader, eucharistic minister, leading the rosary, teaching CCD, and parish council. Everything I did was never enough. I wanted more. God never gave me the type of sign I expected. Instead the sign was in the feeling, the desire that never went away.
After graduating from high school, I went to work on a shrimp boat with my father. On the shrimp boat, I really developed my relationship with God. I spent a great deal of time in prayer. Every morning I would watch the sun rise and feel God's presence at the beginning of my day.
Watching the sun rise, coming up out of the water is a unique experience of God waking us up and looking over all of the creation God breathed since the beginning of time. The water was significant to me too. I always feel God's presence near the water. Water symbolizes life to me. To pull up the shrimp net and gaze on all the variety of life that the water is teeming with is something I am always awed by. I feel that God has called me from the water as he did St.Peter. I answered God's call from a shrimp boat, just as Peter answered God's call from the sea. Whenever a storm came up or we had problems with the shrimp net, I would call on God to be with us and help us. God always answered my pleas. Still that hunger to become a Sister remained.
One Good Friday, I was talking to my sister after the Passion service. I told her that sometimes I felt that God wanted me to become a Sister. She responded with, "I always thought that you had a calling." I asked her why she had never told me this before. It is so important to tell others when you can see that they have a calling. I was looking for a sign and no one ever said anything to me. Sometimes all we are looking for is to have confirmed what we feel.
I decided on that day that I would look and see if I had a calling to religious life or not. I was determined to find out one way or another. I talked to the parish priest who suggested I talk to the Sisters in the parish. I contacted Sister Diane and she put me in touch with the vocation director for the Sisters of St. Joseph. We corresponded for several months. She invited me to a vocation retreat. After the retreat, I was invited to spend a week with the Sisters of St. Joseph in New Orleans. I spent that week with them and knew that it was with them, where God was calling me. I felt right at home with the Sisters. They welcomed and supported me. I have continued to feel that love and support ever since. I have never regretted my decision.
A few years have passed since I entered. I went to college and became a teacher. I am now ready for my final profession and still feel that this is where God wants me to be.
Listen to that silent call. When a feeling, a desire doesn't go away, take a closer look at it. Maybe God is calling you too.
May/June 2000
See, I am doing something new!" (Is. 43:19)
-Sister Elaine Dufresne, CSJ
I believe that the call to be a Sister, like a seed, was sown in my soul even in my mother's womb. There is no doubt that my parents loved me from the first moment of their awareness of me. The tiny embryo was loved, cherished as were the other six children who were the fruit of their love. Family was important to us. And there were numerous opportunities to learn the meaning of family in our Wisconsin farm home. There were chores to share, and time to play.
While religious formation was woven into our daily living, we children also attended religion classes taught by the Sisters each Sunday after Mass. A highlight of the year, for me, was the two weeks each spring when we drove into Somerset to St. Anne's School for religious instructions. Looking back, I now see that the integration of Bible stories, the lives of the saints, music, art, and play, under the direction of the Sisters of St. Joseph, was like a retreat.
It was during my sophomore year that I began to feel an inner call to be a Sister. I saw myself as a nurse and a missionary in Africa. I trusted the mystery of that inner voice that seemed to be calling me, so much so, that I talked about it with my mother. She listened in an encouraging way; her own sister, Marie Joseph, a Sister of St. Joseph was much loved and esteemed in the family. During the last two years of high school, other things than going to Africa took on priority, and "the call" was put on a back burner.
Graduation day came. That evening, after the party, I felt again a strong "something", like a call, a restlessness, a need to act. But how? Where? What did it mean?
One Saturday afternoon, later during the summer, on my way to work, and still wrestling with my feelings, I stopped in for a visit at our parish church. The pastor was praying his breviary, walking up and down the main aisle while waiting for parishioners who came for confession. He stopped where I was kneeling in prayer. I looked up. He said, "Elaine, have you ever thought of being a Sister? Yes", I said." Well, you better think a little harder." He went into the confessional and I went to work. During the next couple of weeks I did "think a little harder" and prayed a whole lot more. I talked with my parents. I visited with the Sisters in the Parish and within a few weeks I was on my way to enter the Sisters of St. Joseph.
God has been faithful. Each day I renew my "YES" to the first call. Each day I recommit myself to living our charism in my prayer and ministry, "...that they may be one, as you Father are in me and I in you; I pray that they may be one in us. . . ." (John 17:21). The "yes" does not grow old.
Recently I rediscovered, (again?) the words of Isaiah, "See, I am doing something new! Now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?" (43:19). The words keep me on my toes! It keeps me listening to, looking for those wonderful gifts of persons and events with which a God of Surprise surrounds me.
My call is lived out with a community of women. Together we have prayed, shared, made difficult and daring decisions believing that Jesus is among us, leading us in our efforts to build the kingdom. The God of Jesus, the God of Surprises has been faithful and compassionate with me through the different chapters of my life and continues to be so. In moments of uncertainty, I am nourished by Eucharist to hope and to trust, and to remember, "See, now I am doing something new! Now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?" (Is 43:19)
Spirit
"Spirit, Power and Passion of my being,
Press upon my heart your profound love.
Move through the fragments of my days;
Enable me to sense your fiery
Presence consecrating my most
insignificant moments."
-Sister Joyce Rupp
As
we prepare to celebrate the feast of Pentecost it is good
for us to recall that the Holy Spirit is always present within
us. In times of vocation discernment we ask the Spirit to
inspire us even more clearly, right?
Every person has a different story and timeline. Yet every
person that I know that has entered religious life always
has a recurring thought or inspiration, that God, the Spirit,
may be calling her to be a Sister.
At the beginning stages of
discernment, when you are not sure about entering, I suggest
that you do not tell your friends and family. This disclosure
could change your relationships, leave you unfree, and add
pressure to your decisions. People may begin to treat you
differently. Friends may imagine you as Sister…"so
and so" and place unrealistic expectations on you. Questions
may interfere with your own process. Some initial teasing
may embarrass you. Do share your discernment with your spiritual
director, your vocation director, or a religious that you
respect.
The time is yours to pray to the Holy Spirit, reflect and
explore possibilities. I have known people that have been
thinking about religious life for a long time, and so they
will move quickly to the community of their choice… others
begin to discern and within three months of visiting a community,
apply for admission to the first stage of the process, or
the Affiliate stage.
"Spirit!
Source
of Vision, Perceptive Guide,
Permeate the moments of my choices
When falsehood and truth both call to me,
Turn me toward the way of goodness, so that I
may lean toward your love."-Sister
Joyce Rupp
If
you have a romantic relationship with anyone, which holds
a possibility for commitment, it will be difficult to discern
at the same time. I suggest that you discontinue the relationship
while discerning. Do continue intimate, intentionally celibate
relationships for support, growth and encouragement during
this time.
Don't wait until you are 100% certain! If you have visited
the community and feel pretty much at home there; if your
head, heart and gut feel good about pursuing a future there,
and if the Sisters welcome you and encourage you … go
for it! Discernment is ongoing and the Spirit is always at
work in us.
Listening… To The Deepest Desires Of My Heart
By Sister Leyla Cerda-Sanchez,CSJ
Irecall writing in my diary just a few months before I became
a pre-novice, " There is nothing I want more than becoming
a Sister of St. Joseph of Medaille". I had met a few
Sisters through out the years in social ministry, at celebrations
and in spiritual direction. They seemed friendly and down
to earth. A turning point was a conversation with one of the
Sisters. I was sharing with her a struggle I had in my ministry
and she shared something like this: "Our charism as Sisters
of St. Joseph is based on John 17:21 "That all may be
one…" It calls us to be unifiers and reconcilers."
I listened to her, and I calmed down. It was a moment of grace.
What did it mean as a vowed Sister on a daily basis to live
out this charism? For months the thought would not leave me
so I began to look for opportunities to come across more Sisters
of St. Joseph.
"To
be and to become the person God
wills you to be, in nature in grace in glory, for time
and for eternity". -Fr.
Jean-Pierre Medaille
Did
I always want to be a Sister? No. When I was a freshman at
a college in Vermont, one of my friends from Nicaragua shared
that she was thinking of entering the convent. I had no idea
what she was talking about! I was having a good time seeing
new places in the New England states, dating a nice guy, and
planning on one day getting married. Years later, I called
her and by this time she was married with children and I was
the one entering the convent. We had some good laughs. God
has a great sense of humor.
It is a mystery how the option for religious life got in my
heart. At first, I said "Not me".
I was quiet and shy. Maybe my sisters are being called; they
were outspoken. I began to get vocation newsletters in the
mail and I always told my younger sisters, "Here, this
is for you". I continued dating and finished my degree
in accounting.
However, the thought would not leave me. I became aware that
the diocese did a vocation retreat twice a year so I signed
up. As the retreat got closer I did not want to go alone,
so I asked my best friend to come along and I signed her up.
I was thirsty for a deeper relationship with God. I remember
a religious sister telling me "En el silencio el Señor
te hablara al corazon" (In the silence God will speak
to your heart) by Henry de Osso. I trusted God was calling
me to this way of life.
By faith, I see this way of life as a gift. For my first vows
ceremony, I remember hearing in the homily: "Keep your
eyes fixed on Jesus". This invitation has been a deep
desire in my heart and I strive to live it out in life giving
and challenging situations with my gifts and shortcomings
in community and ministry. I have received much more from
God throughout my whole life than what I could ever give up.
The vows of obedience, celibacy and poverty have become a
way of life and support my call to center my being and doing
the will of God. Obedience is for me listening to God's
wisdom and recognizing and welcoming the communal wisdom of
the community. The vow of poverty in community for me is a
call to simple living and grow in my dependency in God.
What did I view a call to celibacy to be before I entered
religious life? After? When I entered religious life, I had
no idea what chastity and celibacy would mean and what would
it take to live it for the rest of my life. I was so excited
to be with a group of sisters, to pray together everyday and
to be in social ministry. I had no idea that celibacy would
be so connected with intimacy skills, friendships and relationships.
I discovered that to be the best that I could be as a Sister
of St. Joseph would be for me…"To love, to be loved,
to let love, love"(Fr. Jean-Pierre Medaille)